This isn't going to be cute, funny, or well written. I just need to jot down the facts and my thoughts.
I have been obsessing about two things lately.
1. My memory. It's horrible. I am finding myself putting things in weird places, forgetting to do things, and not remembering who I talked to about what. It's scary. It's even more upsetting to think that I won't remember this time with my family. I'm so worried about that, and that's why I feel like I need to keep writing in the blog. I love being a mom and I am so happy just doing the simple things- like tucking them in, snuggling, watching them swim, watching them play with friends on the trampoline.
Which brings me to the next thing...
2. I am obsessing and worrying daily about how quickly Colby and Miller are growing. It's going too fast and I feel like it's a moving train that I just can't slow down. I would be so much better off if I just enjoyed the moment instead of worrying about them growing up. But it's like I love it SO much and know it's going to come to an end one day, and that makes me so incredibly sad!! When I think back, I have always enjoyed their age and not obsessed about the past, only that the present is moving too fast. So, that means I should just enjoy the present because I will enjoy all the "presents" in the future. Does that make sense? I have also been worrying about when they both leave the house for college. What in the world will I do??
Now that no one is reading this blog, I'm not proofreading, and I know these sentences and thoughts are just jumbled together. I just need to get my thoughts on paper because it's bottled up inside me.
I want to be happy and enjoy the present. It is so hard. I'm so scared of not remembering all of this.
So here's an update:
Miller's bed time routine has grown since I last updated. Now, she crawls under the covers and it goes like this:
Miller: "Hi, what's your name?"
Me: "My name is _______ (tonight it was Hilda). What's your name?
Miller: "My name is _______. (tonight it was Matilda)
Miller" Where are you from?"
Me: I'm from _________. (Alabama, England, Hawaii....the answers are endless). Where are you from?
Miller: I'm from ___________. Want to see me now?
Me: That's impossible. That could never happen. You are too far away.
Miller: How long do you think it would take for me to visit you?
Me: A really really long time
Miller: (pops out from under the covers) "Helllooooo!"
Me: How did you do that?!?!
Miller: I have a teleporter at my house. (although lately it has been a fast jet)
So that's what we do every night after soldier hug. Then I give her a back rub and she reads some more.
Colby still gets his elaborate back rub and I need to apologize to his future wife...I hope he does not ask you to tickle his calves and rub his feet.
Here's a little about Colby right now:
-Loves to have "one more minute" several times at bed time
-Loves his football gloves. Loves football and wants to play but I won't let him.
-Loves to play with his friends. That's his favorite thing.
-Loves to be read to at night even though he can read himself.
-Loves to eat at the sushi restaurant. Gyoza, edamame, salad, shrimp tempura roll.
-Calls his shorts "short sleeve pants"
-Loves playing on the trampoline with his friends and making up games
-Only wears adidas pants. Hates pants in general.
-Loves skiing and is getting pretty good because he takes a little ski class with his friend Colin.
-The best time I have with Colby is at night when I'm reading to him and tucking him in. He loves to be snuggled and wants me to stay as long as I possibly can. He is so sweet at bed time and is finally relaxed enough to talk to me about his day or anything else.
We have had some ups and downs with Colby's medication. He took one in the fall that caused dizziness and nausea during exercise from September- December even though he wasn't taking the medication anymore. It was awful for him because he couldn't swim or participate in PE at school. He is finally better and on a new medicine (adderall) and things are so much better.
He has been getting sick a lot, though. Over Thanksgiving, I got the flu...it was actually on Thanksgiving day and I went to the hospital for the diagnosis. I then spread it to Miller and Lee. Miller had a fever of 105 and that was pretty scary. Colby got the flu over Christmas and also had a really high fever. Then, just a few days ago, he had the dreaded stomach bug. It was bad for about 4 or 5 hours and Lee moved his trundle bed into the bathroom. Thankfully he was pretty much better by the next day.
Here's a little about Miller right now:
-Current best friend is Molly in her class
-Loves to draw
-Loves St. Annes
-Loves to read and flies through books. I can't even keep enough around for her.
-Loves sweets. Poor girl has a wicked sweet tooth just like her mama.
-Loves coach Pat
-Likes skiing with her friend Marin
-Loves her brother and still makes him pictures
-Gives me great big hugs every day, many times a day. Every morning, every night, and all day in between. She loves her mama and I love her.
-Has her two front teeth missing right now. I want to freeze time.
-I have to remind myself that she is only 6 because she seems so much older. I want her to stay my little girl forever. I find myself getting sad at the thought of her dating because I don't want to be second fiddle to anyone. Isn't that crazy?
Swimming is going great for both Colby and Miller. They are both 6 and 8, so they are at the top of their age groups for CYAC swimming. Summer will be awesome for them, too. Knock on wood...
Lee is going out of town for three weeks and is leaving in a week. I am DREADING it. I get scared at night when he's not home. I can't even imagine having him gone that long. He helps so much with packing lunches, dinners, carpool. I can't even wrap my brain around doing it all myself. Ugh.
Funny things:
At the last swim meet, Charlie and Miller wrote graffiti on the YMCA white board with a sharpie marker. It said "preschool stinks" "cat poop" and "dog poop".
The other day, she was holding my tweezers in the bathroom and said "Mommy, I really wanted my own tweeters for Christmas and my own dentures". (my retainer)
Well, that's all for now...
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